Concerto in C4 – Part Tres

I kneel.

I kneel down.

I kneel down to look.

I kneel down to look at him.

I kneel down to look at him
staring.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back at me.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back at me, shattered.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back at me, shattered
glass piercing.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back at me, shattered
glass piercing my illusions.

I kneel down to look
at him staring
back at me, shattered
glass piercing my illusions
of self-confidence.

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4 Responses to Concerto in C4 – Part Tres

  1. Samantha says:

    so. question.

    So… when you write like this (which is great, by the way, I love it!)… Do you have the whole thought in place fist? and then, sort of just build up to it, knowing where you are going? ‘
    OR – do you start with the 2 words… and just see where it goes?

    Inquiring minds, would like to know. Don’t make me call on your muse… she seems nice and all… but, a bit confusing… and, she never did answer the quesiton about the Monkey and why he found Magos so…. ummm… exciting..?? So, I’m reluctant to ask her. 😉

    • wordnerd45 says:

      LOL! Actually, I have a “theme” I am aiming to fill. This is a nestled poem and it is designed to be written and “unfolded” line by line. In order to accomplish the element of surprise ending, I personally do not know what I am going to end up saying. I just know that I am going to build the sentence, word brick by word brick, until it makes one complete thought.

      This style of poem is rapidly becoming one of my favorites, because even I don’t know where I am going to end up going. It always seems to end with me saying “Wow, didn’t see that twist coming!”

      Try it, it’s fun!

      One more thing: the “Conversation with my muse” is a result of hearing the line “Yank it like a monkey in a mango tree” uttered by Alan in the TV Show “Two and a Half Men” after his brother asks him how to deal with a lack of sex. The line is very figurative, and my husband and I both laughed out loud. Suddenly, I had the title for my next poem, which doesn’t actually have anything to do with the subject matter from the TV. I just saw a lot of activity and took it from there.

      My muse openly admits she’s ADHD and Bipolar. One moment she’s a frisky, flirty school girl, the next a cigarette smoking truck driver with a tattoo and a chip on her shoulder. Never a dull moment with her around.

      • Samantha says:

        Interesting. I will try it. I tend to write like that, in general, anyway…. wether it’s a poem, or story, or a journal entry. Just write…and see what comes up. =)

        and thank you for better explaining about the monkey. I was worried about you there for a minute. 😉 LOL It is quite catchy though.. LOL

      • wordnerd45 says:

        I’m fine. Actually, I’m finer than fine. I have decided my muse and I are destined to be close friends and I’m going to start having regular get togethers with her to discuss issues I’ve had on my mind for years. She’s pretty good at coming when I call, or just stopping by unexpectedly. I just know to have an extra cup of coffee on standby. But, she is not allowed to smoke in my house – no matter how badly she needs one. My house, my rules.

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