Conversations with My Muse: Knowing My Audience

Ya know, chickie…people are starting to worry about you.

How so?

You’re having daily conversations with a nonexistent person.

Nonexistent? Who’s that?


But, you’re becoming very real to me.

In what ways?

Well, I know more about you than I did back in, say, June.

I didn’t really exist in June.

Just because I didn’t acknowledge your presence, doesn’t mean you didn’t exist.

Hmmm..feeling very existential today, I see.

Kind of. I’m trying to get away from always writing about writing.

You growing tired of our conversations?

Not at all. I think they’ve been extremely valuable to me.

Then why the sudden desire to wander off topic?

It’s not a wandering, so much as a stroll into other wooded areas.

Come again?

I’m thinking about hiring you for something else other than just writing.

But, I’m a professional muse. Assisting others with writing is, well, that’s my job.

But didn’t you also mention you’re considering going back to school to become a therapist?

I did. Are you on the verge of some mental crisis I should know about?

Not at all — LOL! I just thought you’d be a good person to talk with about “other” things, not just writing.

What kinds of “other” things? That’s a pretty wide topic area there.

Just “other” things. Relationships, general thoughts, creativity, suppressed rage..

Whoaaa, somethings are better left to the professionals. That last part about suppressed rage — I don’t even want to go there.

I was only kidding. I threw that out there just to see if you were paying attention.

I took my morning medication. I’m very sharply focused right now. Knife’s-edge focus.

Ha ha ha! Reminds me of someone…


My dog. Have I ever told you about how focused he is around food?

Yes, he is a beagle, after all…

Of course it helps to have a mom who will feed him yum yums on a consistent basis.

Yea, yea — you wrote something about that: “Who Owns Whom?” — that’s a typical snapshot of your relationship, huh?

Pretty much. I’ve often told people that if he and hubby fell through the ice at the same time, I’d rescue my dog first, wipe him off, warm him up, feed him, then go back for my hubby.

How does your hubby feel about playing second fiddle to a canine?

He understands. He has learned to accept this.

You aren’t really serious about that, are you? Your dog comes before your husband?

LOL — well, the dog does love me unconditionally..

Are we back to a “therapist-patient” thing here? I hope not, cuz I can’t be sworn to confidentiality issues. Not when we’re sitting here chatting like this.

I understand. Naw, I’m wise enough to know when things are for public display, and when I need to keep my mind’s trap shut.

You screwed up the other day, though.

Oh boy, did I. I had to fix that real quick.

All’s right again?

Yep. For now. I guess it’s all relative.

How so?

Certain things need to remain unspoken, or at least unwritten.

Why some and not others?

Well, I’m not saying I can’t share them with you. I just need to be extra aware of who does and does not get to read them. I must be aware of my audience at all times.

Speaking of which — congrats on the blog stats!

Ya, how about that? Over 1,000 hits in less than a month. Someone must be enjoying my words.

I agree — you’re a very good writer, you know. I’ve barely had to assist you in this process. Some folks struggle for days over a single letter. Not you — you seem to get things down quickly, do some minor edits, then voila — another blog post.

Yes, I find my initial thoughts and words are what I really want to say. If I start messing with them too much, I lose the original message.

I get that.

And my voice — I think I’ve finally discovered what kind of voice I have.

And that would be?

Casual, informal, friendly. I prefer this style to anything else.

Even a good rant?

Well, I have my off days too.

Don’t we all? But, overall — how are you feeling about the quality of your writing?

It seems to be improving on a daily basis. Oh! Did I tell you a friend of mine asked me to read and write a professional review of his new book?

Really??? Wow, that’s a real feather in your cap.

Sure is — that shows he trusts my judgment and my writing skills.


But, of course I had to find an error in the book.

Occupational hazard, isn’t it?

Tell me about it. I’ve often referred to myself as “Princess Grammatica, Keeper of the Red Pen”

That’s a good one! Do you proofread much?

I work part time as a freelancer. Low pay, but I love it. Looking to expand my opportunities.

How come?

It really forces me to focus. I look at every little thing on the page, searching for an error like a rescue dog in an avalanche.


What’s wrong?

I’m not a big fan of the end process of writing — you know, the editing/proofreading/rewriting thing. I like the input, not output.

I get that. Not all folks do. I love all stages of writing — from brainstorming until publication. It’s “my thing”.

Well you certainly do come with an arm’s length of credentials.

It’s in the damn DNA, I say.

So, back to this issue of “therapy” writing..

What about it?

I suppose if you need to bend my ear about something that’s bothering you, and it’s unrelated to writing, I guess I’d be amenable to that.

You would?

Yes, so long as we remember whose sitting in the audience, reading our stuff.

I agree, totally.

Well, then — it’s a done deal. Look for some of those musings to materialize from time to time.

Will do.

I guess I better go check my email. I’m waiting to hear how that speech in Darfur went.

How did that turn out, presentation wise?

Oh, that was very intense. She did all she could to keep from breaking down. I had to stand beside her and hold her shoulders, she was shaking so much.

Do you think the speech worked?

The government officials looked pretty stoic — hard to read them. Not sure what will come about as a result.

All you can do is just give us our words, the rest is up to us.

So true.

Okay, gonna go get some lunch and get on with my day.


Sure, why not?

Later, chickie.


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